Tag: Self-awareness

I’ve Always Liked Eccentric People

First of all, I love people in general. There are interesting aspects about every individual. We are all unique in our own way. Some individuals are extra unique, or what some may call eccentric.

 I am not eccentric myself, but I have always loved others that are!

We’re All Different

I find those that are eccentric to be captivating. They really hold my attention and to me, they are such an inspiration to live authentically.

Maybe it’s the way that they approach life without a care in the world, maybe it’s the fact that they don’t worry about what others do or say, they just live. Eccentric individuals aren’t typically afraid to be themselves or go against the crowd. They have their own way. There are those with eccentric looks and personalities and those with both!

Individuality makes this world go round. A life that is lived out of fear of what others think is a miserable feeling! It’s not always easy or even safe to live the life that we desire, but if we are able, it can be so freeing.

Expression 

I think much of the time, our personal appearance is a statement to the outside world. While looks don’t matter in a sense, sometimes eccentric looks are a message and a statement that cannot always be verbalized. People will have general thoughts about others based on what they see.

Personality is often ingrained, but there are some parts of us that we can use as a form of expression. We can’t judge a book by its cover, but we can get an idea of how someone may want themselves to be portrayed.

My Goal

This year, authenticity is my goal. Overall, I am doing better than I expected. I feel as though I may be drawn to eccentric individuals because they can usually live fully authentic lives. They are able to show and express themselves on many levels and not worry what others think of them, or if it goes against the norm. Some may be afraid to be themselves, but the fact that they took the plunge to be different is amazing to me!

I truly admire and love people that can so easily be themselves. There’s no thinking involved, they just live freely and without worry. We all have fears, but someone like myself lets it run my life and I am trying hard to change that. I overthink and worry too much about what others think. There is freedom beyond that type of thinking!

So Much Beauty

There is a lot of beauty in being yourself. Eccentric or not, we all are unique and have something special to give this world and others. Most people struggle to be fully authentic at some point in their lives, even those who aren’t afraid to express themselves. Human nature takes over and we often experience similar feelings and situations as we are all part of the human race.

The world needs you, all aspects of YOU. Cheers to living authentically!

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I Looked for True Love

When we were young, we had thoughts of how our lives would pan out. Maybe we dreamed of college, a job, marriage, and a family. Possibly we wanted to travel the world and start our own business.

Whatever our goals and plans were, we probably didn’t see foresee that some of our plans wouldn’t happen or would happen in ways that we never expected.

My Dream

As a young girl, I dreamed of getting married and starting a family. Being a mom was all that I had ever wanted, and I am incredibly thankful to be one today. Finding true love was another one. This is where I pause.

I have always been pretty unlucky in love. I have found myself in the oddest and most uncomfortable situations and met some very ungenuine people. I have my faults too and I am working on them, I truly feel that it takes two to make a relationship work.

My biggest fault is that I don’t fully communicate my thoughts and feelings. I would rather save someone’s feelings, but in the end, it only makes things much worse.

The Old Saying

They say that you find love when you aren’t looking. They say that love will find you at the right time. I believe both of these to be true. No matter the stress and impatient feelings, I know that timing is everything and I believe that what is meant to be will always find its way.

When I was a few years younger than I am now, I would constantly look for love. Where was my soulmate? Where was the person that was created to be with me? Why is he so hard to find? Thoughts of how unlucky I was in love never left my mind.

I looked for love everywhere. I looked at Church, in the grocery store, walking through the neighborhood, and at the gym, I even turned to online dating. I met some people here and there, but it never moved past the first few dates or so. We just weren’t a match and I had to be okay with that. Many times, I was looking for something more than the other person was. I wanted a serious relationship; I wasn’t looking for anything casual.

A Realization 

One day it hit me why some of my relationships didn’t work out, why “the one” hasn’t shown himself to me. One day it hit me why love didn’t find me no matter how hard I tried. There was one simple yet complicated answer. I had to love myself first.

I spent many years looking for someone to make me whole and complete me. I looked high and low for someone who I could spend my life with. Someone who would genuinely love me for who I am, faults and all. That person doesn’t exist, it is up to me to feel whole and complete. A partner can only add to the base that is already there. In my case, there wasn’t much of a base.

I knew that I had to make some changes. I had to love myself so that I could fully give myself to someone else. I just started working on this several months ago. I haven’t made as much progress as I had hoped, but slowly I am trying to change that. I speak positive affirmations as I look in the mirror, I try to forgive myself and not be so hard on myself.

I am doing the best that I can. I am human, I have faults and I will never be anywhere close to perfect, but I still deserve to love myself to the fullest. It’s a hard task, but it’s very important to me. I hope that one day, loving myself first will create a foundation that true love can build on.