It’s Just an Emotion

I have been a very sensitive person ever since I was a young girl. I remember being able to feel others’ emotions so profoundly to the point that it oftentimes would negatively impact me.

In my early teens, I would cry a lot because I wasn’t sure how to regulate all of these emotions. Couple that with being a teenager and having emotions all over the place anyway, and you have yourself a recipe for a pretty challenging phase of life.

My View

I viewed emotions very negatively in my younger years. Pleasant emotions of course were wonderful but feeling any sort of unpleasant emotion was such a great deal to me.

It almost felt that whenever I felt anger, sadness, guilt, or any other unpleasant emotion, it was magnified. I would do anything that I could to prevent myself from feeling pain or anything unpleasant.

I always felt so overwhelmed by my emotions, because not only was I feeling mine, I was absorbing everyone else’s. They call us, Highly Sensitive People (HSP).

Break It Down

An emotion is just that. It’s a feeling and if we give it power, it can consume us.

Emotions are fleeting, it’s important to acknowledge that they are there, but not place constant emphasis on them.

Emotions are a part of life and a part of being human. A lot has been going on in my life lately. I was talking with a friend, and she told me the other day that “feelings are just feelings, and we don’t have to let them play such a large role in our lives.” I started to look at emotions differently.

Suddenly, the extreme power that emotions had over me became more of something that needs management rather than bringing me from 100 to 0. I appreciate this notion that she shared with me greatly. Other people can have a profound impact on our lives!

Yes, emotions are strong, and they are valid, real, and important, but we don’t have to let them consume us. We can let the feeling stay a while and then we can work on ways of processing the emotion.

A Word Within a Word

Take a look at the word emotion. The word motion lies within it. Our feelings bring a great motion in and out of our lives.

They come and they go. Emotions are fleeting. The happy emotions we wish would stick around longer, yet the unhappy ones we are glad to get rid of.

Change is a Constant 

Everything in life changes. Sitting and dwelling on a certain feeling can prolong its stay in our lives.

We can look inside and acknowledge how we feel at a particular moment, realize the impact that something has had on us, and then chose to let it float away. Maybe not far away, but we can try to distance ourselves from it so that it doesn’t consume us and become “a part” of us.

I’m Trying 

Every day, I try not to get stuck. I try to remember my friend’s wise words about letting myself feel the emotion, but not becoming trapped in it.

It’s amazing how much humans can help each other. We all see things very differently and approach life in different ways.

The impact of another’s words is a constant reminder of how powerful they are!

Lost in Introspection

Where do you spend most of your energy? Do you spend it on yourself, or the outside world? Maybe a mix of both? I spend a lot of my energy projected outwards. While this has its benefits, it also is detrimental.

Life needs balance. We are human beings capable of so much, but our energy is precious and unfortunately finite. We need to take care of ourselves to function the best that we can in society.

I Have a Problem

I have always tended to not fully process things going on in my life. As with many of us, life has been very hectic, tiring, and nonstop lately.

When life gets crazy, I tend to be fueled by an adrenaline rush as I try to become Superwoman. Life happens, situations pile up, and I keep putting out the fires without truly processing what is in front of me.

It isn’t until I am depleted of physical and mental energy that I realize all that I am doing on a day-to-day basis without taking the necessary steps to process it all.

Introspection Comes into Play

The term introspection means to look inward at your feelings and become aware of them. It is a practice of examining your soul.

After going strong like Superwoman, my introspective side comes out as I try to take in what life has thrown at me. A little too late! At this point, I am already burned out and trying to build myself back up. Ironically, once I enter a state of introspection, it is difficult to get out of it. I then become almost lost in this state as a way to distance myself from reality.

Introspection is so important and should be done regularly. I have found myself in this situation countless times and I have vowed to now keep a journal of my thoughts and feelings so that I can process them as they happen instead of sitting back and collectively looking at a massive pile of things that have happened to me.

A Daily Check-In

It is so important that we look after ourselves as we go about our daily routines. Life tends to get in the way, and we do not take enough time to really understand all that we do and go through. In this process of introspection, it is then that we can learn about ourselves!

Fill in the Blank

The mind is an amazing and powerful thing. Most of the time it works for us, sometimes, however, it can work against us.

Much of our thought process is automated, we see or hear something, and our brains automatically process the stimuli. Our brains are capable of thinking many thoughts, sometimes it is as if our brain is on a never-ending hamster wheel. Our thoughts go around and around.

Interesting

I have noticed something that I do automatically, and other people have told me that they do as well. When I hear of a situation, or even when I am going through something, my mind thinks of what is going on without having all of the facts. Simply put, my brain is assuming that it knows about something, or someone given the facts that it has, but much of the time it is far off.

How many times have you been left on read, experienced the silent treatment from a loved one, or have not been able to reach someone? Chances are worry and anxiety take over and you run through the worst possible scenarios in your head without thinking much about it.

How Do You Perceive the Above?

Looking at the situations above, what is the first thing that your mind comes up with? If we are left on read, we may assume that someone is busy, or we may automatically think that this individual does not want to talk to us for whatever reason. When given the silent treatment, we may conclude that we have upset someone. Our thoughts might immediately turn dark if we cannot reach someone, we may fear the worst that something has happened to them.

What do all of these instances have in common? They cause our brains to fill in the blank without having all of the necessary information to reach a valid explanation. We experience something and we think that we know exactly why it’s happening. We have made an assumption and assumptions are dangerous.

As I Grow

I still automatically think of reasons when a situation occurs, but I realize that doing so, creates a lot of anxiety and unnecessary overthinking. I try my hardest now to look at a situation logically instead of out of fear and I also make sure to directly communicate and gather information.

I have found that my usual “fill in the blank” approach to life’s situations wasn’t working in my favor, so I try very hard to gather information so that I know what is happening versus what I think I know is happening. It has made a world of a difference!

Why the Difference?

One of the greatest things in life is the love and support of family and friends. Why do we treat our loved ones so much differently than we treat ourselves? We should make taking care of ourselves mentally and physically our utmost priority. We cannot give much of ourselves to this world if we are not whole.

Most of us are very hard on ourselves, I know that I am. I’m told this over and over again, yet I don’t see it myself.

Imagine that you made a mistake on a project that you are working on at your job. You might tell yourself “I can’t do anything right; I am such a failure.” Flip this situation around. A family member or friend is in the same situation, they just made a huge mistake on a project they were working on. What do you tell them? Would you tell them that they cannot do anything right and that they are a failure? Probably not. Instead, you might tell your friend that they did the best that they could do and that they are only human and it’s natural to make a mistake now and then.

You and your significant other just got into a fight and you start saying to yourself “I am never good at relationships,” you keep telling yourself “I am a terrible communicator.” What if a friend was going through this, what would you tell them? Maybe you would say that they should take some time for themselves to regroup and try to remedy the situation, maybe you would tell your friend that relationships aren’t easy, that constant effort is needed, and this doesn’t make them a bad person.

Do you see the differences in how people typically speak to themselves versus a loved one? One’s internal dialogue is so very important because we start to believe what we tell ourselves. Negative self-talk is very detrimental to us and those that we have a relationship with.

Why is it that we can so easily support the people that we love, but we cannot give that same grace and support to ourselves? Why is it that we can quickly build someone else up, while so easily tearing ourselves apart?

We are so hard on ourselves due to human nature; we know all of our faults and weaknesses and we tend to not have patience with ourselves. We also know about our pasts, and we carry parts of that with us. Whether we like to admit it or not, it does affect our confidence. We like to place other people on a pedestal, while we are the ones that are flawed as we strive to be perfect, something beyond human capability.

The next time that you are dealing with something in life, and you find that you are being hard on yourself remember to stop and ask yourself what you would tell a loved one that was in your exact situation. You give so much kindness, hope, and empathy to others, be kind to yourself…you deserve it.

I Knew That Was Going to Happen

Have you ever just been going about your life when all of a sudden you are hit with a very strong gut feeling, an urge/push, a premonition about something that ended up happening? That little feeling is called intuition.

Having a sense of intuition is something that is innate, it is inside us all, but in varying degrees. Some of us are extremely in tune with our ability by either gift, or simply working on strengthening the ability and others are not in tune, or even possibly not aware that they possess such a trait. You may have noticed for example when someone calls, or sends you a text message, you may automatically get a sense of who is contacting you before you even reach your phone…that’s intuition!

Ever since I was a little girl I had a very strong intuition, this ability has only grown as an adult. I’ve always been interested in this topic and I do try hard to strengthen this ability, so perhaps that is why I notice it more as an adult. When you are at one with your intuition, you will notice that it just “feels right” and you feel at peace. Have you ever gone against your gut feeling? How did that make you feel? Chances are it made you feel pretty uncomfortable and worried. Our bodies are telling us information all of the time. We can discover some pretty amazing things if we sit down to listen to what it has to say.

Try to follow your gut feelings because most of the time they will be correct. Your mind and heart can get in the way of a lot of things, including messages that your true inner self is trying to tell you. I have such a passion and interest on this topic. Please feel free to share any intuitive experiences that you have had!