Lost in Introspection

Where do you spend most of your energy? Do you spend it on yourself, or the outside world? Maybe a mix of both? I spend a lot of my energy projected outwards. While this has its benefits, it also is detrimental.

Life needs balance. We are human beings capable of so much, but our energy is precious and unfortunately finite. We need to take care of ourselves to function the best that we can in society.

I Have a Problem

I have always tended to not fully process things going on in my life. As with many of us, life has been very hectic, tiring, and nonstop lately.

When life gets crazy, I tend to be fueled by an adrenaline rush as I try to become Superwoman. Life happens, situations pile up, and I keep putting out the fires without truly processing what is in front of me.

It isn’t until I am depleted of physical and mental energy that I realize all that I am doing on a day-to-day basis without taking the necessary steps to process it all.

Introspection Comes into Play

The term introspection means to look inward at your feelings and become aware of them. It is a practice of examining your soul.

After going strong like Superwoman, my introspective side comes out as I try to take in what life has thrown at me. A little too late! At this point, I am already burned out and trying to build myself back up. Ironically, once I enter a state of introspection, it is difficult to get out of it. I then become almost lost in this state as a way to distance myself from reality.

Introspection is so important and should be done regularly. I have found myself in this situation countless times and I have vowed to now keep a journal of my thoughts and feelings so that I can process them as they happen instead of sitting back and collectively looking at a massive pile of things that have happened to me.

A Daily Check-In

It is so important that we look after ourselves as we go about our daily routines. Life tends to get in the way, and we do not take enough time to really understand all that we do and go through. In this process of introspection, it is then that we can learn about ourselves!

Fill in the Blank

The mind is an amazing and powerful thing. Most of the time it works for us, sometimes, however, it can work against us.

Much of our thought process is automated, we see or hear something, and our brains automatically process the stimuli. Our brains are capable of thinking many thoughts, sometimes it is as if our brain is on a never-ending hamster wheel. Our thoughts go around and around.

Interesting

I have noticed something that I do automatically, and other people have told me that they do as well. When I hear of a situation, or even when I am going through something, my mind thinks of what is going on without having all of the facts. Simply put, my brain is assuming that it knows about something, or someone given the facts that it has, but much of the time it is far off.

How many times have you been left on read, experienced the silent treatment from a loved one, or have not been able to reach someone? Chances are worry and anxiety take over and you run through the worst possible scenarios in your head without thinking much about it.

How Do You Perceive the Above?

Looking at the situations above, what is the first thing that your mind comes up with? If we are left on read, we may assume that someone is busy, or we may automatically think that this individual does not want to talk to us for whatever reason. When given the silent treatment, we may conclude that we have upset someone. Our thoughts might immediately turn dark if we cannot reach someone, we may fear the worst that something has happened to them.

What do all of these instances have in common? They cause our brains to fill in the blank without having all of the necessary information to reach a valid explanation. We experience something and we think that we know exactly why it’s happening. We have made an assumption and assumptions are dangerous.

As I Grow

I still automatically think of reasons when a situation occurs, but I realize that doing so, creates a lot of anxiety and unnecessary overthinking. I try my hardest now to look at a situation logically instead of out of fear and I also make sure to directly communicate and gather information.

I have found that my usual “fill in the blank” approach to life’s situations wasn’t working in my favor, so I try very hard to gather information so that I know what is happening versus what I think I know is happening. It has made a world of a difference!

Something to Look Foward To

Life can take us on a journey in many different directions. There are good days, bad days, and days in between.

One thing that I love to incorporate in life is having something to look forward to, this way no matter what is going on in my life or what kind of day I have had, I can keep my eye on something that will bring me happiness at the end of the day.

Things That I Look Forward To

It varies what I end up choosing to think about to get me through the day, week, or month. It may be as simple as getting some ice cream or something bigger like looking forward to an event that is coming up.

Having things in mind that bring us happiness is a great way to keep a bad mood at bay and help us stay motivated while having a long day at work, school, or just in general. When I was working, I would think of a piece of chocolate that I was looking forward to enjoying and also my favorite TV show.

Try This!

As you go about your day or week, try to think of a few things that you can look forward to when you get home from a long day. It may be a hug from your significant other, a hot meal, a dessert, a movie while relaxing on the couch, it might be a good book, a walk, spending time with pets, or even taking time for yourself to write. Whatever it may be, pick something to focus on and see what a mood booster this can be in your life!

Seeking Comfort

The fall season is loved by many people including myself. Fall is my absolute favorite for many reasons including the beautiful changing leaves, the crisp autumn air, the stillness of nature, and the cozy feeling that it elicits.

Fall is just a beautiful season to enjoy all around and this lovely season invites us to start looking inward and building warmth.

From Birth

Ever since we were born, we were in need of comfort. We needed the warm embrace of our caregivers, and we needed love. It’s human nature to seek all things that bring us comfort. Possibly it takes us back to when we were young and gives us a sense of security and peace.

As we get older, our need for comfort doesn’t go away. Sometimes people will go to great lengths to feel safe and content. No matter our age, we all love the feeling of being cozy.

Imagine This

Close your eyes for a moment and picture yourself in your bed wrapped in blankets, feel the warmth and softness of your bed and how it keeps you warm. Next, imagine yourself sitting on the couch with a warm cup of tea or coffee, curled up with a blanket, and watching your favorite movie.

Now picture yourself in a big sweater, you feel the warmth and coziness, and the sweater makes you feel safe and protected. We can’t forget about comfort food, something that we turn to when we are stressed, or need a little mood booster.

Human Nature

As human beings, we try very hard to avoid anything that causes us pain and suffering, we will go to great lengths to have our needs met and to feel safe and loved.

We are bound to feel the positive effects of cultivating coziness and comfort in our lives! Try taking a hot bath, embracing a loved one, or cozying up next to a window while watching the rain fall. Notice what a mood booster this is!

You Can Run, but You Can’t Hide

I am sure that most of us have been in a situation where we were unhappy with life. Maybe we didn’t like our jobs, were stuck in a relationship that we didn’t see going anywhere, or possibly we didn’t like our social circle because we felt as if we didn’t belong.

For those of you that were in situations like these, how did it make you feel? What was your first instinct telling you how to handle the situation?

Natural Response

One of the reactions when faced when a tough situation in life is to flee. It goes back to the fight-or-flight response in Psychology. As we experience hardship, we either tend to stay and fight, or our adrenaline starts to rush, and we flee to escape the perceived threat.

We want to flee to avoid having to feel negative emotions, we flee as a way of avoiding experiences, even avoiding ourselves.

Question for You

Think of a time when you felt so upset and discouraged that you wanted to get up right then and there and leave. You wanted to pack up your office because you couldn’t stand your job anymore, you wanted to run away and hide from your significant other because you felt that you two grew apart instead of together. Think of a time when you felt like an outsider, that even with friends around, you still felt alone in this world. Did you flee?

Many of you did and that is a normal response. Even though it’s normal, it may not be the best way to approach these situations because instead of facing the issue and growing from it, we chose to run away. It felt right at the time, maybe even taking off some of the anxiety, but what ended up happening?

Noticeable Patterns

After we ran from the situation, we felt much better, but as time goes on, the past usually comes back to haunt us.

The key is to look at the issue at hand and see where you can learn from it. If there is some sort of inner conflict, then these types of situations that make us want to flee can give us great insight into what we can improve on.

Communication

Much of life and life’s problems revolve around communication or lack thereof. Sometimes we may feel as though we do not have the strength, or even the skills to solve what is happening to us, so we just decide to flee to make our problems instantly disappear.

I have learned this the hard way, the problems seem to have magically disappeared until, weeks, months, or years later they resurface again because they were not addressed the first time.

Try This

Those situations that make you feel like you would just rather run away than deal with it can be our greatest teachers. Try to live more authentically and see how you can fix your life circumstances. Work within yourself to discover that you have the strength and power to face any issue head-on.

I want to make an important note that in certain situations, we absolutely must flee. Those situations include those that affect our safety etc.

The Takeaway

Life tends to find us, we can move to a different state, change jobs, or even hunt for that “perfect” someone, but what we have not corrected from our past will eventually show up in our future. We may flee, but life follows. We are still the same person inside.

I believe that life is one big test and that we are here to learn many lessons. The lessons will keep repeating themselves over and over until we have learned how to master them. Pay attention to the things that make you want to run and hide, address them so that you have power over them!