Dear Regret: You Are My Teacher

There are more times than I can count that I have walked away from a relationship, or situation and felt a sense of regret. I would tell myself that I knew better and then came the hamster wheel of thoughts including the should have, would have, and could have. Regret is a very difficult feeling to have to sit with and one that can plague us for years to come.


I can think of many times that I regretted a certain behavior of mine, or how I handled a certain situation. I know that the saying goes to “live life without regrets,” and for the most part, I do, however, I also replay certain events over and over because they didn’t pan out how I had hoped. I don’t regret anything 100% in life because I believe that everything happens for a reason, but if I was able to go back in time I would have done certain parts and situations of my life differently.


The most recent situations that I regret are how I handled the end of a relationship and how I handled a conflict at my old job. As hard as it is, there is no use dwelling on the past because what is done is done and there is no way possible to change any of it. What can we change? We can change the way we respond to a similar situation in the future, we can learn from what we didn’t like about something in our lives and we can grow from it and try to implement it in our daily lives today and moving forward.


Regret is a teacher in our lives. When you feel a sense of regret, that means that something didn’t align with your beliefs and values. Most of the time, we know how to better handle a person or situation, but for some reason, it didn’t work out that way. We are only human, life is not going to always happen exactly the way we want it to.


I can tell you that both of the situations that I mentioned above could have been handled much better if the communication was different. We all know the value of communication and how things can very quickly fall apart without it. I have learned my lesson and hopefully, those two instances don’t ever repeat themselves in my life, but if they do, I will be much better equipped to handle them.


Think of a situation that you regret. Think of how it made you feel then and how it does now. What did you learn about yourself in this situation? What did you learn about life? Some of our darkest moments in life, although painful, can be our biggest teachers. Whenever I find myself dwelling on something from my past, I try to quickly stop that pattern of thinking and I counteract it with thoughts of what I learned and how I am a stronger and better person today because of what I went through. Life is one big test and there are teachers all around us, keep going and working towards the person that you strive to be and you will end up passing with flying colors.

Find the Meaning

Have you ever got to thinking and realized that some situations keep arising in your life? Do you get upset or mad at yourself when you respond exactly the same way to life each time? Are you confused on why certain things don’t seem to stop repeating themselves over and over? Perhaps you may think you are doing something wrong, or that your life will never change, but it can and it will in time.

I am a firm believer that all situations in our lives, good or bad, were placed there to help us grow and become the best person we can possibly be. They were meant to teach us and make us stronger. I truly believe that each lesson is there and will result is greatness once mastered. Think of how amazing the feeling is when you conquer something, or you no longer struggle with something that has plagued you because you didn’t give up on finding a way to change and make it work.

Life can no doubt be very challenging, sometimes I let my struggles get the best of me. Lately I have been trying to challenge my thoughts by thinking of what I am meant to learn by my circumstances. What lesson is this situation, or person trying to teach me? Life is all about learning and pushing forward.

To-Do List

With so many responsibilities in life, I’m sure that many of us have a to-do list, planner, journal, calendar, etc. It helps us keep track of what’s to come and helps keep us organized and on top of things. I never really used to make a to-do list except for college, I always relied on my memory to remember what I needed to do, but these days with so much going on and a brain that doesn’t remember like it used to, I need a calendar and a to-do list!

I actually enjoy crossing off things that are completed off of my list, it gives me a sense of accomplishment and satisfaction. There is something so satisfying about crossing out something that you once had to do! It gives you motivation to keep going and to get things done. Being organized definitely makes life a lot easier and less forgetting makes life less stressful! I wish you all a beautiful week, as always thank you for reading.

Sometimes it Takes a Reminder

We go through life day in and day out, sometimes unknowingly on autopilot. Sometimes we get so used to a routine, our possessions, the people in our lives, that they become a natural part of us and we forget that these things are not necessarily ours to have forever. Sometimes it takes a reminder to truly realize and cherish what we have.

I believe that most people are thankful and grateful for what they have. They give thanks for all of the blessings in their lives and don’t take anything for granted, but when life presents situations and circumstances that take away something, or someone, that is when we realize how valuable it really is. There is a quote by Joni Mitchell “Don’t it always seem to go, that you don’t know what you’ve got til it’s gone.” Like I mentioned before, most of the time we do realize, just not to as great of an extent until we no longer have it.

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Take the Covid-19 pandemic for example. We were all completely and unexpectedly uprooted from our daily routines and into a completely different one. Something as small as getting up and going to work was no longer the case for many people. Another example, you have a car that gets you from Point A to Point B, but one day your car breaks down. You might get a rental car, or get a ride with a friend, or loved one, but it isn’t until your car is no longer that there you realize it’s true value. I am sure that people realize the value of life and how precious it is, however that is greatly amplified when we lose someone either by death, or by a broken relationship. It is often at a funeral that we are reminded of how precious life is and how in the blink of an eye the people that we have in our lives today sadly may not be there tomorrow. We tend to think naturally that what we have, we will always have.

Being grateful can bring so much quality to our lives. There’s so much to be thankful for and things that have become natural to us in our lives like the roof over our heads, still for some people is something that they are praying for. It’s very difficult wanting something so badly in life, there is no doubt about that, but if we look at what we have instead of what we lack, life can become a little easier for all of us!

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The Magic that Happens Just by Being You

Be yourself…that sounds easy right? After all, we are living everyday as ourselves, or are we? I am sure that a lot of us can think of a time or times in our life where we didn’t stay true to ourselves whether it be due to stigmas in society, peer pressure, fear, whatever it may be, it prevented us from being our authentic self. I believe that for many of us, we don’t realize how often we “stray” from ourselves. For example, we could hold back on saying something in a meeting, limit sharing our thoughts, feelings, and opinions with friends and family, or not sticking up for what we believe in.

It seems as though many of us have this innate fear of being seen as different, being judged, fear of trusting and opening up, fear of failure, not being loved, so many other reasons that prevent us from being our true selves. One factor that I have noticed especially in myself is that once I let go of my fears, the world opens up to me. This of course, is not always easy to do, but when we start to love ourselves, boost ourselves the way we so easily boost others, say what we feel, and ask questions, that’s when the magic happens!

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We can learn to be ourselves by analyzing the way that we approach people and situations that happen to us in life. We can pay more attention to our interactions with family, friends, coworkers, others in general. Are we saying what’s on our mind and in our hearts? Are we asking questions when we are worried about something instead of believing that we already know the answer? Do we stick up for what we believe in? Do we push ourselves to do the best that we can in life? We can be conscious of the moments and situations where fear takes over and use them as opportunities to slowly start putting ourselves out there. Overtime, this can become second nature.

As with a lot of aspects of life, we cannot control what others do and say, only how we handle ourselves in these circumstances. There will be people that judge and form opinions about us, but I personally have felt that the freedom that comes from being your true self far outweighs any backlash or fears. When you allow yourself to be open, vulnerable, fearless, you open up so many windows of opportunity in the areas of life and personal growth. I have found that living my authentic self has decreased my worry and anxiety and has let me grow and develop as an individual. Remember, you are amazing and beautiful just as you are…let it shine!!

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