Left Unsaid

Communication is the basis of all human relationships and human interactions in general. When we communicate with others, we do so verbally and non-verbally. Sometimes it’s the non-verbal cues that give more meaning than what is actually being said. We have the choice to say as much, or as little as we want to, but sometimes leaving the important things left unsaid has the potential to create many problems.

Some things are better left unsaid, this includes anything that someone might take offense to, anything unkind, or hurtful should not be said. There are other instances where speaking up and saying what is on your mind and in your heart is vital and could make or break relationships that you have with other people.

I have gotten better with time, but I am guilty of not always sharing what I should be. Don’t get me wrong, I definitely stand up for myself, maybe a little too much sometimes, but I do struggle with sharing what’s on my mind with others and I have ended up in some bad situations because of it. Communication really is key and is highly valuable and important. Every situation where we feel like we have not done all that we could have, or we feel that we could have approached the issue in a better way, helps us grow and learn.

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We may be afraid to say certain things to others for many reasons. We might be afraid of judgement, rejection, hurting people’s feelings, we may fear losing someone, when in actuality we may lose them to not communicating our needs and wants effectively. Not speaking from your heart and trying to cover up, or ignore issues only leads to resentment and relationships can quickly spiral down from there.

When we say what is bothering us, or what is on our minds, we free ourselves. It is a heavy weight to carry something unsaid around with you, it weighs on your mind and heart. So many of life’s issues and situations can be solved with effective communication.

Like I mentioned before, some things are better left unsaid, but others are not. If there is something weighing on you, something you can’t get out of your mind, something that has put distance between you and a loved one, it’s never too late to try to mend, or make a relationship better. Don’t leave anything important to you left…unsaid.

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Going with the Flow

I have a little pocket calendar that I use to keep track of important dates, events, appointments, etc.  I look at it often to see what is going on for the week, I don’t typically rely on a calendar so much, but during these times with so many changes and things going on, I can’t keep my mind straight!  What has surprised me, especially in the last few months, is how many changes I have made to my calendar…this led me to write about an important topic.

Over the last few months ever since the Covid-19 pandemic broke out, I have found myself erasing many plans out of my pocket calendar, not only that, I have found myself needing to add unexpected events to my calendar as well.  This happens of course in general, because life is ever-changing, however even more so in the last several months.  I think we all realize how much life changes, but having the “proof” right there in front of you is very eye-opening.

I have always been the kind of person that loves to have a routine and to have things planned out.  I know that some people are very go with the flow and they like adventure and spontaneity, and while I enjoy these things occasionally, if I don’t have a stable routine and plans laid out, I become very unsettled and anxious.

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One thing that I have learned is that we can plan all we want, but life is going to unfold as it should regardless of the plans that we make.  Life can change for us in a matter of seconds, hours, days, it is always evolving and although we have control over many aspects of our lives, we don’t for others.  I suppose this constant change makes life interesting, keeps us on our toes, and helps us grow as a human being.

One thing for sure, one good and very helpful quality to have is being able to just take it easy and go with the flow.  When things don’t work out as planned, I still tend to get anxious and disappointed by it, but I am learning to be more patient and to remind myself that if something does, or does not happen, that it was just meant to be that way.  It’s not easy, but try just going with the flow and see how that can bring peace to your life.

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When Friendship Fades

“You have three types of friends in life: friends for a reason, friends for a season, and friends for a lifetime.” – Ziad K. Abdelnour. Do you ever just sit and ponder life and the past? Maybe you think about past relationships, friendships, jobs, a particularly exciting time, or milestone in life. Sometimes we think of how things could have turned out, or we question if things could have worked out with a certain someone if we had approached things differently.

People come and go, it is a part of life, not one that is easy to accept, but one that does unfortunately happen. When I was younger, losing a friend felt like the end of the world, it filled me with such sadness. I often wondered if there was anything that could have been done to save the friendship, or wondered if I had done something wrong, the same goes for romantic relationships. I would say to myself “If only I had communicated more,” “If only x,y, and z, didn’t bother me so much.”

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Now that I am older, I see a loss of friendships and even relationships in a new light. It is still painful to no longer have someone in your life, but I look at it in a different way and that brings me peace. I truly believe that what is meant to be in our lives will always be. There is nothing that can take away someone or something in our lives that is meant to be there.

Ziad K. Abdelnour’s quote that I mentioned in the intro of this post is really beautiful and I find to be so true. He explains that friends come into our lives for a reason, a season, or a lifetime. This is true for all people and things in our lives in my opinion. I really believe that certain people are put in our lives for a reason, they are here to teach us, strengthen us, and help us grow. Some people in our lives are here for a season for the same purpose. Not all people in our lives today are meant to stay there for the long haul. My belief is that certain people cross our path for a special and particular purpose. Lastly, we have the friends that are meant to be with us for life, the “family” that we choose, the ones who have been there through everything.

I believe that we should definitely do all that we can do to save a friendship or relationship that we value, however if it feels like you are doing all of the work, try to remember that anything that you have to force probably isn’t supposed to be there in the first place. As hard as having friendships fade over time is, I hope that you find peace in knowing that some people were not always meant to stay in your life, but you will always have the memories, lessons, and you will have experienced growth.

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An Overview of the Seasons

The seasons come and go just like the days of our lives. For some places of the world you may only have one or a few seasons and others, like where I live, we have four. I am thankful to be able to experience all four seasons and what they have to offer. I notice that each of the seasons brings out a different part of myself and evokes many beloved memories.

The year starts during the season of winter. I used to not like the bitter cold, or the massive blizzards that winter can possibly bring, but I have come to embrace it. I enjoy snuggling under a blanket, drinking tea or hot chocolate, staying cozy indoors, baking, and watching movies. Winter is a season that helps me conserve my energy and reflect inwards. It’s definitely a season full of self-reflection for me, a reminder to sit back and enjoy a slower pace of life. There’s nothing like standing outside after a huge snowstorm and just being one with the still and silence of the world.

Spring follows with slightly warmer temperatures, a reminder that things that we see as cold and dark do have an end and eventually do see light. The insects and other creatures resurface and life starts to unfold again. Spring is an awakening of my soul. The warmer air and the budding of the flowers and trees are a reminder that even in the darkest times, life will flourish again.

The long hot days of summer really make me feel alive. The warm sun on my skin the fresh cool breeze bring me to life and give me energy. The summer is so freeing. Trips to the beach…what an amazing place for your soul. The summer months are big in helping me feel free, inspired, and motivated. It’s a little slice of Heaven to feel the sun on your skin and warmth after a long winter.

Lastly fall…one of my favorite times of the year. After the heat of summer, the cool fresh breeze is so welcomed. Fall is such a cozy and refreshing time of year for me. The leaves change color marking the passage of time and as they eventually begin to drop off we end up transitioning back into winter…and there you have it, the seasons will continue to cycle through and through.

As we make our way through each season, I am reminded of the passage of time and the beauty that life has to offer. Life won’t always be beautiful, there will be many challenges that we will face, but life is ever-changing and moves on just like the seasons. Cherish every moment and have a beautiful day!