What is Your Current Goal in Life?

All of us are working on some aspect of ourselves or our lives. We want happiness, stability, and a sense of belonging.

We may often take a look and evaluate our lives and where we want to be. We may notice aspects of ourselves that are working for us and parts that need to change.

Throughout our lives, our goals may change depending on what season we are in. We may jump from wanting to visit the gym every day, to wanting to advance ourselves in our careers, to desiring marriage and children. Whatever goal you are trying to reach, most likely the result that you are searching for is happiness.

My Current Goal

I would like to share with you a goal that I am currently working on. It has been quite a struggle, but I am determined to reach it because I know that it will greatly impact my life.

Growing up, I was never one to share what was on my mind, or in my heart. I was friendly with others, but also shy, especially in my teenage years. I kept to myself a lot and was very reserved. I didn’t want to open up to anyone. I was always afraid of rejection, or worried about what others would think of me.

Fast-forward to the adult that I am today and unfortunately many of those same qualities remain because I have never taken the time to try to fix them until now. My fears of rejection led me to not live authentically. It led me to live a life of superficial relationships and communication that was nothing more than small talk.

I Craved More

I knew something was missing in my life. Despite my shy nature growing up, I felt that there had to be something more, I knew something was lacking. I was a girl that hardly made eye contact because I lacked confidence. I was friendly with other people, but it never went beyond small talk because I was so afraid to open up and be myself. The vulnerability was a scary feeling.

As I became older, I realized that I craved a lot more from life and my relationships. I craved eye contact, I craved deep conversation, and I wanted to be close to others and be able to talk freely and openly.

My Goals

I want to live more authentically. I want to be able to openly and directly communicate with other people. I desire to fully love myself. I truly want to be able to communicate with others without needing to sugarcoat or communicating indirectly.

If someone has hurt me in some way, most of the time I have a hard time letting them know because I don’t want to cause any issues. Little do I realize, not sharing my true feelings and openly communicating my needs and wants only backfires.

I want to live freely and not worry about what other people think. I want to be able to openly communicate what is on my mind without fear that I will be rejected or that it will start some terrible argument. I want to be able to express myself confidently.

I know this goal may sound silly to some because most people do not have trouble being who they are and saying what is on their minds. Somewhere down the line, I chose to walk around hiding my innermost feelings even though they begged me for an escape. Somewhere down the line, I lost who I was. I made a promise to myself that I will speak only kind words and love towards myself and that I will always openly share what is in my heart.

How My Goal is Going

I have done fairly well in implementing my goal. I keep having to remind myself to keep communication open and sometimes I still catch myself filtering my thoughts, but I am working very hard to reach my goal of living an authentic life. There’s no more allowing my voice to not be heard because I am afraid of the aftermath, there is no more walking around with a smile on my face pretending that everything is okay to avoid getting on someone’s bad side. I am true to myself.

I am no longer letting my fear of rejection or losing someone that I love be what stops me from being true to myself. I have learned one too many times that lack of communication will most likely end in a failed relationship. Unspoken words lead to grudges, which leads to distance between two people. True and stable relationships will be able to weather the storms in life. I have learned the value of communication.

Question for You

As with many life changes, implementing a goal to alter yourself or your life is not an easy task. It’s human nature to be creatures of habit and to want to stick to a life of comfort and things that are known to us. We crave stability and familiarity even though this does not help us grow.

If you would like to share, what is your current goal in life? What steps are you taking to reach your goal? Life is all about learning to find what works for you and what makes you happy. Life is all about discovering ourselves and trying to pass the greatest test that we will ever be faced with. Whatever you are desiring and working on, I wish you all the best as you try to reach your goal!

Determination vs. Obsession

Ever had a goal that you absolutely had to reach, or an idea that you just were compelled to make happen? Life gives us many opportunities and allows us to go after whatever our hearts desire.

Some people are more laid back and work towards what they want at a slower and more carefree pace and others are strongly determined from the beginning and won’t stop until they have what they sought after. I am one of those people. Sometimes I focus so much on what I want that I expend all my energy until I have it.

Determination after a while can start to feel almost like an obsession. We live and breathe our desire and at some point it may be all we can think of and focus on. Our minds can really run away on us and we can lose ourselves. We must remember to keep control over ourselves and not let our minds run wild and become so wrapped up in our desires!

Go For It

Most of us have dreams and aspirations that we hope to achieve at some point in our lives. We have this vision of how we would like life to pan out and it probably hasn’t gone exactly as planned. There are deep desires within us, things that we would like in our lives, that would make us feel whole. There is a burning desire to reach our goals and find happiness.

For some of us, our life goal may be the perfect career, marriage, having children, serving our country, going to college, or just making the world a better place to live in. Whatever our goal may be, we find happiness and hope in trying to pursue it. The end result is hopefully eventually fulfilling our dream.

Sometimes life hands us things that we were not prepared for and many of us get busy in our every day lives and put our dreams on hold. Some of us are waiting for that perfect moment to start working towards our dreams…there is no perfect moment! Start now, your life most likely will not play out as you have envisioned, but it will still be beautiful. If you don’t start today, you may miss the opportunity of a lifetime. Go after what you want in life and don’t stop until you get there!

Rose-Colored Glasses

Recall the phrase “to see things through rose-colored glasses.” This positive look to life is not always to our benefit as ironic as it sounds. The phrase itself means to view, or to see life positively, seeing the good, being optimistic, being more carefree. While it is an excellent way of going through life, there needs to be a balance of seeing the good vs. seeing the full picture.

For most of my adult life, I have been more of the glass half-full, positive, happy, optimistic kind of girl. Of course depending on what life throws at me, I will definitely have my days, but overall I tend to remain mostly positive. In terms of this phrase, I do tend to see life and the people in it through “rose-colored glasses”. I can tell you firsthand that although most of the time this is a great approach in life, it has caused quite a few problems as well.

I am a firm believer in being positive and looking on the bright side of things and while this is in my nature, it is also self-taught, and was instilled in me at a young age. I feel like when I encounter situations, or people in life, I view them as seeing the good by fault. Of course, I realize that not all situations are good and neither are all people, but it is in my nature to hone in on the good so much that I tend to cover up the bad. This is something that I would like to change, so that I can develop more of a sense of what is real and genuine vs. only seeing the good. I feel like you can’t really go wrong with looking for the positives in certain situations, except maybe when you allow yourself to stay in a bad situation because you are only looking at the pluses. Where I feel this would really help me is when dealing with other people.

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When I first meet someone and start to get to know them, I of course see both the good and human sides to them, no one is perfect, or without flaws, however I tend to just focus on their good traits, so much so that I may let that overshadow signs that they may not be a loyal or genuine person. It’s almost like me telling myself “This person has been there for me in the past and just because they are doing x, y, and z now, doesn’t mean that they are not genuine.” It’s like I see signs, but I try to focus only on the good that person has done for me and that is sometimes a mistake.

My hope is to be able to see people for who they really are, good and bad, not only just focusing on the good. There have been signs thrown at me here and there, yet I tend to choose to counteract it, sometimes I even negate it. One day at a time and one lesson at a time, I will work on it. It’s wonderful to view life with rose-colored glasses, but make sure to take them off once in a while!

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