5 Greatest Life Lessons I’ve Learned

Life is an everyday learning experience and we are constantly evolving and adapting in order to create the best life that we possibly can. I am continuously learning about myself and the world around me, however I have come up with five lessons that I have learned that have helped me tremendously with personal growth.

  1. Take care of yourself mentally and physically. This probably seems obvious, but something that most of us don’t pay enough attention to. We do such a great job of taking care of others, we also need to remember to take care of ourselves both physically and mentally. It’s very difficult to go through life’s demands when we don’t feel sound as a human being. Taking full care of ourselves allows us to live life easier and fuller. Physically, we can eat a balanced diet, make sure that we are drinking enough water, exercise, or keep active in general. We can keep up with selfcare that helps us feel our best. Mentally we can take breaks when we feel overwhelmed, even if it’s a short coffee break, any sort of break lets us recharge. Everyone has a limit and it’s good to recognize when you are getting burned out so that it can be stopped in its tracks. Go for a walk, not only does this help physically, but also helps greatly at clearing our minds. Just being in nature is so refreshing and helps remind us that we are part of an amazing universe. Pamper yourself – take a hot bath, get a massage, take a course, pick up a hobby, etc. When we are mentally and physically whole we can take on anything!
  2. Stop worrying about things that you cannot control. Okay, this is a difficult one, especially for me, but I have learned ways to implement this. It’s so easy for anxiety and worry to take over, then one thought or worry snowballs into another and another. Worrying is a valid human emotion, however we can do ourselves a favor by focusing and putting our energy into things that we do have control over. Worrying about the unknown or uncontrollable aspects of our lives, robs us of the energy that we need to focus on what we can change. I believe in fate and I believe that what’s meant to be will be, this helps me sit back, relax, and breathe. When a worry or situation strikes I ask myself: Do I have control over this? If I do, well I can figure out an action plan and if I don’t, then I try to take the situation day by day and try to give up that control. I also analyze the situation to see what I can do and what my options are.
  3. Share your energy wisely. As much as we sometimes like to think of ourselves as superheroes, we are human beings that have limits and a limited amount of energy reserves. Life alone can be very draining of these reserves, so one tip that I have learned over the years is to be careful who I share my energy with. If you are around negative people, or people that bring you down, this will deplete your energy overtime. On the contrast, surrounding yourself with supportive and uplifting people can do wonders for your wellbeing. It’s human nature to want to care for others, but we should be cautious where we expend our energy.
  4. Don’t take things personally. Not so easy to do right? Someone says or does something that hurts or offends us and we take it to heart. We start to think what’s wrong with me? Does anyone like me? Is this individual acting this way because of me? We may feel like we are at fault and are the root cause of problems. The truth is, most of what people say isn’t about us at all, it’s about the other individual. Lots of times our worry and fear make us extra sensitive and we can view what’s happening incorrectly, making us question ourselves, and lowering our self-esteem. During these times, we must step back, analyze the situation, and try to understand that most likely the reactions and thoughts of others are in fact only fears, projections, and emotions of the other individual that they need to work through.
  5. Follow your instincts. We were born with instinct. We hear phrases like “follow your heart,” and “do what feels right.” Some people have a stronger intuition than others. There are claims that intuition can be built upon and made stronger. Often times, these innate feelings are subconscious and other times it’s like the message is clear as day. These gut feelings are there for a reason: to warn us, inform us, help us, guide us, etc. Most often, that little, or should I say big voice inside of us is accurate.

I really hope that you have found these helpful!

Boundaries

Boundaries mean different things to different people and our personal limits and boundaries vary greatly between us. Most of us don’t even realize that we go through our every day lives setting these invisible boundaries between ourselves and the world around us. These may be expressed by our body language, spoken words, or our instincts that tell us to get closer or back away.

Some individuals have very open boundaries, they are freely themselves, and are open and friendly with many people. Some have what we call “a wall up,” where it’s very difficult to let people in and there are many limits and boundaries in place to prevent one from getting too close. Others are somewhere in-between and this is personally where I aspire to be. For most individuals, I am quite difficult to open up, I don’t trust many people easily, so I subconsciously set limits and boundaries between myself and other individuals. There are some people where I feel instantly comfortable with and it’s with them that my wall is lowered and sometimes I end up getting too close emotionally in a short amount of time. I continuously strive and work for a balance.

There are benefits and downsides to having many boundaries, just as there are benefits having minimal boundaries and being a free spirit. The benefits of having many boundaries is that you can guard your mind and heart a little better, you can choose who you feel is worth your energy and who deserves a place in your heart. The downside is that you may be missing out on getting to know others if you are closing them off, we may be missing out on connections and experiences. The benefit of having minimal boundaries is that you truly enjoy life and experience it to the fullest, the negative is that you may get hurt more by putting your mind and heart on the line. Wanting to put up limits and boundaries can and does protect us, but is also hurting and hindering us.

Having boundaries in place is both beneficial and necessary in all relationships including family, friendships, romantic relationships, coworkers, etc. These boundaries help to keep us happy and to feel respected as a human being. It’s up to us to speak our minds and speak up for ourselves if something doesn’t feel right, it’s up to us to communicate our needs to others, there’s no way for them to know otherwise. In return, we also need to pay attention to the needs and wants of others.

Before I end for now, I must touch on the fact that humans have many emotional and physical needs and will often go about meeting them any way they can because for most of us, not having our needs met is very painful. For example, we may grow very close to a stranger because we are in dire need of friendship and don’t want to feel alone, or we may get into a relationship right after a breakup because we no longer have that individual who was fulfilling our needs. The dynamic between people truly fascinates me and is ever-changing.