Tag: Authentic

I’ve Always Liked Eccentric People

First of all, I love people in general. There are interesting aspects about every individual. We are all unique in our own way. Some individuals are extra unique, or what some may call eccentric.

 I am not eccentric myself, but I have always loved others that are!

We’re All Different

I find those that are eccentric to be captivating. They really hold my attention and to me, they are such an inspiration to live authentically.

Maybe it’s the way that they approach life without a care in the world, maybe it’s the fact that they don’t worry about what others do or say, they just live. Eccentric individuals aren’t typically afraid to be themselves or go against the crowd. They have their own way. There are those with eccentric looks and personalities and those with both!

Individuality makes this world go round. A life that is lived out of fear of what others think is a miserable feeling! It’s not always easy or even safe to live the life that we desire, but if we are able, it can be so freeing.

Expression 

I think much of the time, our personal appearance is a statement to the outside world. While looks don’t matter in a sense, sometimes eccentric looks are a message and a statement that cannot always be verbalized. People will have general thoughts about others based on what they see.

Personality is often ingrained, but there are some parts of us that we can use as a form of expression. We can’t judge a book by its cover, but we can get an idea of how someone may want themselves to be portrayed.

My Goal

This year, authenticity is my goal. Overall, I am doing better than I expected. I feel as though I may be drawn to eccentric individuals because they can usually live fully authentic lives. They are able to show and express themselves on many levels and not worry what others think of them, or if it goes against the norm. Some may be afraid to be themselves, but the fact that they took the plunge to be different is amazing to me!

I truly admire and love people that can so easily be themselves. There’s no thinking involved, they just live freely and without worry. We all have fears, but someone like myself lets it run my life and I am trying hard to change that. I overthink and worry too much about what others think. There is freedom beyond that type of thinking!

So Much Beauty

There is a lot of beauty in being yourself. Eccentric or not, we all are unique and have something special to give this world and others. Most people struggle to be fully authentic at some point in their lives, even those who aren’t afraid to express themselves. Human nature takes over and we often experience similar feelings and situations as we are all part of the human race.

The world needs you, all aspects of YOU. Cheers to living authentically!

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Walking on Eggshells

Some of you may know my goal for this year is to be authentic and not be afraid to just be me. In most ways, I feel like I am doing better in this area, and in few ways, I feel like I am slipping back into my same old patterns.

Thankfully, I know what stops me from being authentic, but sadly I don’t know how to work through it. The two things that stop me the most are fear of rejection and being perceived incorrectly.

Experiences

As we go through life, we accumulate many different experiences, some good, and some bad, but they all shape us in some way. These experiences become part of us and it’s hard to shake. Our beliefs and thought patterns are tied closely to what we have gone through in life.

I have been guilty of this too, but I feel that we live in a world that is full of judgment and people making assumptions. Oftentimes we see a person, or a situation and we have instant thoughts that come to mind. This is natural, we automatically think of many things when we see something. Much of the time, our perceived view of a person or situation couldn’t be farther from the truth. This is why looks are deceiving.

There have been times when I could have put money on a situation that was unfolding, or that I knew something about someone. I can tell you that I was floored many times by how wrong I was. As ironic as it is, most things in life are not what they seem.

My Thought Process

I always feel the need to censor my thoughts and actions. That I need to go through the motions in my head before I allow them to be free. I try to examine how each thought or action could be misconstrued or misinterpreted. I know that much of this is my anxiety talking, but a lot of it is due to unfortunate circumstances and past experiences.

I feel like trusting in today’s world is very minimal. We place trust in people every day without realizing it. When we drive a car, we are placing trust in the other drivers being responsible and safe while sharing the road with us. We trust that when we go to the store someone will be there to help us find what we are looking for and serve as a cashier when we are ready to check out.

When it comes to true trust as in relationships, I believe that many of us have trust issues due to our pasts. I feel like it takes a lot for someone to trust someone else, myself included. Past hurts spill over into our future and it’s hard to start over with a blank slate even though everyone deserves that chance to prove themselves as trustworthy.

Life Lessons

One thing that I learned the hard way is that one has to be careful when interacting with others. There are many instances where people perceive what is happening as something that it is not. Sometimes people take actions the wrong way. It’s at no fault of their own, everyone perceives things differently, however, it can make for a very difficult situation.

Even though I am much more introverted than I used to be, I have a very friendly personality and I love to talk and engage with other people. You can usually find me smiling even when that smile is covering up the pain. People take my laughter, smiles, and genuine concern for others as me flirting with them or being interested in them in some way. Of course, this is great if this is the case, but I often find it heartbreaking for me because I feel that I can’t be myself with others without creating an awkward situation. Someone always sees my personality as a step further than it really is.

Baby Steps

Sometimes I feel like I need to scale back, hide, repress, and not put my true self out there. Part of me wants to clam up because I never want someone to see me in the wrong light. I strive every day to be seen as the genuine and trustworthy person that I am.

In the end, I know that one is not supposed to care what others think because we know what is in our hearts and our minds. We know our intentions and it’s not up to us to make sure that everyone is on the same page. We all see things differently and that’s where open communication comes in.

These feelings leave me walking on eggshells daily, but I won’t give up. I won’t allow fear to hold me back. I have the power in me to take control of a situation instead of it controlling me. Life has enough stress, there’s no need to add to it! I am not responsible for other people’s thoughts or actions, only my own. I aspire to live a life where I don’t have to rehearse everything. One baby step at a time, I will learn to just be me…to just be.

Speaking Your Truth

We all have a voice inside of us, stories that are uniquely ours, and life experiences that no one else has experienced exactly as we have.

Deep in our souls is our truth. At our core is what we believe in, everything that we feel strongly about, and every ounce of who we are. This truth, 100% of it at least, is hardly shared with the outside world.

Bits and pieces of ourselves are released and exposed to a rare few, but much of our core remains in hibernation.

My Word 

I chose authenticity as my word for 2023. I am working on expressing myself fully and not being afraid to be vulnerable and be myself. I don’t want to have to censor my thoughts and feelings, I want to be open and express myself in the way that others seem to do so effortlessly.

Feelings

The feeling of not sharing our truth and expressing ourselves can be very detrimental. We need some sort of outlet for our deepest emotions, whether it be through journaling, writing, or verbally communicating. 

Withholding thoughts causes a lot of inner turmoil. It can create stress and that can lead to even more intense emotions. The older I get, the more I realize just how powerful speaking our truth can be.

Lately

I have been trying very hard to stay true to myself. I am trying to take each situation and conversation that presents itself in my life as a new chance to speak my truth. I still fall, but I am holding myself accountable.

I’ve noticed that when I share my thoughts and feelings, I feel so much lighter…almost like a weight has been lifted from me. When emotions are released it’s almost as if their power is taken away. They can no longer haunt us and cause inner turmoil. They are free to escape and roam, lessening our burdens.

You Are Needed

The world needs your truth, and the world needs YOU. We all add value to this world. We all have stories that we can share to help and inspire others. We deserve to be heard, loved, cared for, and respected as the individuals that we are.

Speaking your truth puts you on the path to freedom.

Who’s ready to start this journey with me?

I Am Afraid to Be Me

I know that this title sounds silly, but it is the absolute truth. I am afraid to be me and by this, I mean that I am afraid to be real, raw, and 100% authentic.

I believe that this way of thinking stems from my younger years. I was bullied a lot for being a shy kid. I wanted to have a lot of friends; however, I didn’t have the greatest communication skills. The friends that I had were more like acquaintances, I felt like no one truly knew me because I had a wall up.

Why I am Afraid 

I am scared of being judged, abandoned, rejected, and ridiculed like I was back when I was younger. I have completely morphed into a very different person today, but that shy introverted teen still lives within me and so do the scars.

Everyone wants to feel love and acceptance and the thought of that being withheld is very painful. I am afraid to say what’s on my mind, my beliefs, or who I am. Parts that I don’t like about myself I try to hide, hoping that no one will notice.

The Outside Doesn’t Match the Inside

I am the kind of girl that hides behind a smile and a face full of makeup, I am the kind of girl that will sugarcoat what I think to not hurt someone’s feelings, I am someone who would rather keep my feelings inside to avoid hurting someone’s feelings. I am the kind of girl that everyone thinks has her life together and doesn’t have a care in the world. They don’t see that I put up a front that all is okay even when it’s not.

I am mostly outgoing and bubbly, I love to joke and have fun, and I love deep conversation and getting to know other people even though I clam up when they try to get to know me. I love to laugh.

I admire those that are real and raw. I admire those that can share what is on their mind and in their hearts without fear. They can share parts of themselves and not care what other people think. They are just them and I love that, I aspire to be that.

As I Get Older 

I am getting better at being authentic. I am learning to share my mind and learning to communicate better to prevent getting myself into an even worse situation. I am trying very hard, and this is a real goal of mine that I am desperately trying to reach.

I am very good at giving advice and terrible at following my own, I am a work-in-progress, and I am truly hoping to continue down this path of being 100% authentic and having true self-love.

An Important Reminder

Each one of us is unique and beautiful and our past has no place in the present or future. Sometimes it is hard to shed parts of ourselves, but we keep showing up every day, learning and growing.

What is Your Current Goal in Life?

All of us are working on some aspect of ourselves or our lives. We want happiness, stability, and a sense of belonging.

We may often take a look and evaluate our lives and where we want to be. We may notice aspects of ourselves that are working for us and parts that need to change.

Throughout our lives, our goals may change depending on what season we are in. We may jump from wanting to visit the gym every day, to wanting to advance ourselves in our careers, to desiring marriage and children. Whatever goal you are trying to reach, most likely the result that you are searching for is happiness.

My Current Goal

I would like to share with you a goal that I am currently working on. It has been quite a struggle, but I am determined to reach it because I know that it will greatly impact my life.

Growing up, I was never one to share what was on my mind, or in my heart. I was friendly with others, but also shy, especially in my teenage years. I kept to myself a lot and was very reserved. I didn’t want to open up to anyone. I was always afraid of rejection, or worried about what others would think of me.

Fast-forward to the adult that I am today and unfortunately many of those same qualities remain because I have never taken the time to try to fix them until now. My fears of rejection led me to not live authentically. It led me to live a life of superficial relationships and communication that was nothing more than small talk.

I Craved More

I knew something was missing in my life. Despite my shy nature growing up, I felt that there had to be something more, I knew something was lacking. I was a girl that hardly made eye contact because I lacked confidence. I was friendly with other people, but it never went beyond small talk because I was so afraid to open up and be myself. The vulnerability was a scary feeling.

As I became older, I realized that I craved a lot more from life and my relationships. I craved eye contact, I craved deep conversation, and I wanted to be close to others and be able to talk freely and openly.

My Goals

I want to live more authentically. I want to be able to openly and directly communicate with other people. I desire to fully love myself. I truly want to be able to communicate with others without needing to sugarcoat or communicating indirectly.

If someone has hurt me in some way, most of the time I have a hard time letting them know because I don’t want to cause any issues. Little do I realize, not sharing my true feelings and openly communicating my needs and wants only backfires.

I want to live freely and not worry about what other people think. I want to be able to openly communicate what is on my mind without fear that I will be rejected or that it will start some terrible argument. I want to be able to express myself confidently.

I know this goal may sound silly to some because most people do not have trouble being who they are and saying what is on their minds. Somewhere down the line, I chose to walk around hiding my innermost feelings even though they begged me for an escape. Somewhere down the line, I lost who I was. I made a promise to myself that I will speak only kind words and love towards myself and that I will always openly share what is in my heart.

How My Goal is Going

I have done fairly well in implementing my goal. I keep having to remind myself to keep communication open and sometimes I still catch myself filtering my thoughts, but I am working very hard to reach my goal of living an authentic life. There’s no more allowing my voice to not be heard because I am afraid of the aftermath, there is no more walking around with a smile on my face pretending that everything is okay to avoid getting on someone’s bad side. I am true to myself.

I am no longer letting my fear of rejection or losing someone that I love be what stops me from being true to myself. I have learned one too many times that lack of communication will most likely end in a failed relationship. Unspoken words lead to grudges, which leads to distance between two people. True and stable relationships will be able to weather the storms in life. I have learned the value of communication.

Question for You

As with many life changes, implementing a goal to alter yourself or your life is not an easy task. It’s human nature to be creatures of habit and to want to stick to a life of comfort and things that are known to us. We crave stability and familiarity even though this does not help us grow.

If you would like to share, what is your current goal in life? What steps are you taking to reach your goal? Life is all about learning to find what works for you and what makes you happy. Life is all about discovering ourselves and trying to pass the greatest test that we will ever be faced with. Whatever you are desiring and working on, I wish you all the best as you try to reach your goal!