Leave What Cannot Be Undone

How many things are you currently worried about that cannot be changed? For many of us, it is quite a few things. We may be dwelling on a decision that we made, or regret some of our past behaviors. As hard as it is to not worry, analyze, and overthink the past, it is so necessary for our well-being and to be able to move forward.

As much as we may wish, our energy both physically and mentally is not infinite. We must take great care to preserve our energy and save it for things in our lives that truly require every bit of energy that we have left.

When we worry about things that happened in the past, we are using our precious energy on something that truly cannot be changed, it cannot be undone. I’m sure that you can count many times that you have said something like “I wish I didn’t leave my job,” or” I wish that I could go back in time and redo a certain relationship.”

Living in the Past

When we live in the past instead of the present, we are robbing ourselves of energy that we could be taking to solve problems and deal with life in the here and now. The past cannot be changed, what is done is done and I know that is very hard to accept sometimes but accepting that fact and also being able to leave what cannot be undone in the past is so important.

We could spend countless hours of our lives thinking we could have, would have, should have and although it can be a stress-reliever to overthink and analyze these thoughts, it serves us no purpose, it does not keep us from moving forward, it does not allow us to make good decisions now that will shape our more desired future.

Often, I find myself thinking of the past, how I would change certain things about it, and how I would have done things differently, yet if I spend all of my energy focusing on what I cannot change, I am wasting precious moments of my life where I can make a difference. As hard as it is, leave the past in the past. It is a part of you, but it does not define you, nor does it deserve any energy from you.

My Best Advice

Worrying about something that you can’t change is very common human behavior, however, it will get you nowhere. When you find yourself slipping into thinking about things that you are not able to change, then acknowledge that you are feeling a certain way and then let it go. Remind yourself that you are focusing on working towards things in your life that you currently have the power to influence.

Whatever you are worrying about today, know that things tend to happen for a reason, things happen for life to fall into place, and things happen for you to grow as a person, whatever you are worrying about today, know that the past is in the past and the present needs your attention. Though difficult, may this be a gentle reminder to put your thoughts, time, and energy into what you can control. Many blessings to you all!

Dear Regret: You Are My Teacher

There are more times than I can count that I have walked away from a relationship, or situation and felt a sense of regret. I would tell myself that I knew better and then came the hamster wheel of thoughts including the should have, would have, and could have. Regret is a very difficult feeling to have to sit with and one that can plague us for years to come.


I can think of many times that I regretted a certain behavior of mine, or how I handled a certain situation. I know that the saying goes to “live life without regrets,” and for the most part, I do, however, I also replay certain events over and over because they didn’t pan out how I had hoped. I don’t regret anything 100% in life because I believe that everything happens for a reason, but if I was able to go back in time I would have done certain parts and situations of my life differently.


The most recent situations that I regret are how I handled the end of a relationship and how I handled a conflict at my old job. As hard as it is, there is no use dwelling on the past because what is done is done and there is no way possible to change any of it. What can we change? We can change the way we respond to a similar situation in the future, we can learn from what we didn’t like about something in our lives and we can grow from it and try to implement it in our daily lives today and moving forward.


Regret is a teacher in our lives. When you feel a sense of regret, that means that something didn’t align with your beliefs and values. Most of the time, we know how to better handle a person or situation, but for some reason, it didn’t work out that way. We are only human, life is not going to always happen exactly the way we want it to.


I can tell you that both of the situations that I mentioned above could have been handled much better if the communication was different. We all know the value of communication and how things can very quickly fall apart without it. I have learned my lesson and hopefully, those two instances don’t ever repeat themselves in my life, but if they do, I will be much better equipped to handle them.


Think of a situation that you regret. Think of how it made you feel then and how it does now. What did you learn about yourself in this situation? What did you learn about life? Some of our darkest moments in life, although painful, can be our biggest teachers. Whenever I find myself dwelling on something from my past, I try to quickly stop that pattern of thinking and I counteract it with thoughts of what I learned and how I am a stronger and better person today because of what I went through. Life is one big test and there are teachers all around us, keep going and working towards the person that you strive to be and you will end up passing with flying colors.

Decoding the Anxious Mind – Tips to Relieve Anxiety

Most of us feel some sort of anxiety in our lives during specific life situations like a new job, moving to a new house, having an argument with a loved one, giving a presentation, etc., however there are individuals like myself that struggle with anxiety on a daily basis. This is the more extreme form, not your typical anxiety here and there. In this blog I will be talking about my personal experience with anxiety and also tips and tricks that I have found to be very helpful along the way.

I have dealt with anxiety since I was a young child. Things often worried and scared me without any particular reason. I remember being so tense about things and I couldn’t relax enough to be a wild and free kid like many children are. I of course had a ton of fun in my childhood and have many great memories that I will never forget, by this I mean I was an overly-cautious child and that hasn’t changed much to this day! As I grew into my teen years, my anxiety became more apparent. I was extremely shy, I hardly spoke to anyone. My hands would sweat and I was afraid of what others thought of me. I was so shy and nervous that it prevented me from even knowing what to say to other people, I had a lot of trouble keeping a conversation going with anyone outside of my family. I believe that anxiety and shyness are in most cases part of being a teenager, however my anxiety was extreme and impacted many areas of my life. Now, as an adult I still suffer from anxiety, but I have made a lot of improvements by submerging myself into situations and forcing interactions with others until they became natural. This took years and years for me to be able to do, but now good luck getting me to stop talking!

I am reminded of my anxiety on a daily basis with varying degrees depending on what’s going on in my life. I have experienced those dreaded panic attacks, moments where you literally cannot get your mind from snowballing from one idea or fear to the next, and times where you feel like you are literally going insane and losing control. I have thankfully found ways to manage and lessen my anxiety and I am happy to share them with you! In some cases, the tips below will not suffice, there are cases where individuals should seek a professional to help them develop a deeper understanding of where the root of their anxiety might be coming from. Here is a list of tips that have helped me:

  1. Be out in nature – it’s so peaceful and relaxing and makes you realize that we are a small part of something so much greater
  2. Go for a walk – the physical aspect is very good at calming anxiety, being exposed to nature is an added bonus if you walk outside
  3. Take a hot shower or bath – heat is so soothing and relaxing and so is the sound of water!
  4. Write or journal – express and relieve emotions. I love to write and blog
  5. Have a hobby and a focus – this keeps your mind busy, an idle mind is not a good thing, there’s too much thinking. A hobby gives you focus and hope as well as something to look forward to, it’s a nice distraction
  6. Talk with like-minded people – this can help you realize that you aren’t alone and you aren’t as different as you feel from society. I know a lot of times I literally have anxiety about having anxiety, so just to know that there are others that have similar fears or experiences, makes me not feel so alienated

I truly hope that you have found these useful!