I Should Have

Life leaves us with many questions. We spend much of our day going through the motions and trying to do the best we can with what life presents to us.

Being human is not easy! We deal with a lot of situations, trials, roadblocks, detours, we deal with pain, and a brain that feels like it’s on a never-ending hamster wheel.

Thankfully, on the contrary, we also have beauty, resilience, love, determination, and strength, and we are learning to be better every day.

A Common Phrase 

I notice myself saying “I should have” so often…too often. Possibly even daily. I found myself saying this a lot just this morning and it doesn’t give me the best feeling. 

Why am I saying this over and over? Are there regrets? Am I not confident? Is it because I am human? Could it be because I wonder what COULD have been? I pondered the answer and I suppose it’s a mix of all.

After I do something or make a decision, you can most likely find me saying “I should have done x,y, or z instead.”

My Thought Process 

I am a very deep thinker and observer. I am always in thought, which is exhausting. I am very much an over-thinker.

When I make a decision, I am always wondering what would have happened if I chose a different path or made a different decision. Sometimes I wish that I could foresee the future to know how a situation will play out. Don’t we all!

This way of thinking is detrimental and also against one of my favorite phrases “everything happens for a reason.”

Let’s Change This Around

If I want to be more confident in my decisions, I need to change my mindset. This may help you as well!

I truly do believe that everything happens for a reason and that in time we will have what we need and want. I believe that we may stray from the life path that has been laid out for us, but something will always bring us back to where we are meant to be.

It’s natural to wonder, but we can’t possibly know the answer to everything, nor should we. At the moment, we make the best decision that is right for us and we move forward. What will be, will be!

Worst case scenario, we end up in a place that doesn’t suit us and we can then make further decisions on how to remedy that.

The Takeaway 

Life is all about making decisions, taking risks, and figuring out what is best for us along the way.

We can’t be so afraid that we don’t live. Fear shouldn’t be what controls us, we are smart and capable and in the end, most things work out even if there is a long dark tunnel to get there.

I encourage you to practice this with me! Let’s stop thinking about what could or should be and let’s focus on what IS!