Most of us have been there, we have a friend or even a best friend that we expect to stay by our sides forever, and then poof, just like that they are gone from our lives. The loss of a friendship leaves us feeling so many emotions and dealing with many questions that arise.
Losing anyone we love be it through death, a breakup, or a friendship betrayal, are all very painful. Essentially, we are mourning the loss of a person that once was a huge part of our lives. It’s very difficult to carry on without a special someone who was right by our side. I, like many, have dealt with the loss of several friendships and I still think of them to this day.
People have a way of staying etched into our minds. Good or bad, the memories stay and the lessons that came with them will never be forgotten. Sometimes the friends that end up leaving are the ones that you least expect. The friend that was by your side for 20 years, the friend you grew up with, the friend that was there through thick and thin, the one person that you never thought would leave did and now you are left with a million and one questions.
So many things start to run through your mind when friends choose to move on without you in their lives. You may start to question your worth, your relationship skills, and your ability to communicate effectively. You may wonder if this person was ever genuine in the first place and if you will ever be able to trust again, you may wonder what this individual’s intentions were. Thankfully, for the most part, it’s not you. This goes back to the old saying “don’t take things personally,” because most of the time they truly are not personal.
As much as we would like, some people are just not meant to stay in our lives. Maybe they were sent down our path for a particular reason or just a season, but how we grew as a person cannot be taken away. The memories and gains will live on.
There are past friendships that I still ponder over. I sit and think of where things went wrong and what I could have done to have prevented the loss from happening. Someone who was once your best friend that you told everything to is no longer there to support you, someone who was your listening ear is no longer there to hear you out. The friend that you did everything with is no longer by your side. It can take a toll on our self-esteem.
When you start to feel a good friend of yours slipping away, make sure to ask questions and engage with them to find out what is going on. Sometimes people just need space, but other times maybe feelings were hurt, or your life paths changed significantly such as having children or getting married. Whatever the reason may be, if you have done everything in your power to mend or try to bring back a friendship then you can relax knowing that at least you did everything that you could and you don’t have to live with any regrets. The ball is then left in the other person’s court.
For those friendships that we have in our lives who have truly proven themselves to be genuine, we must hold onto them very tightly. A true friend is a rare find in this world. Keep moving forward in life and know that the true people that you have in your life will never leave your side.